Ten Mistakes You’re Making in Your Novel

Posted bymcbruce56Posted inUncategorized
Photo by Al
  1. Main character likes to tell Hitler jokes.
  2. Buddy of main character is gourmet cockroach chef.
  3. Too many porcupines, not enough armadillos.
  4. Your protagonist gets lazy and lets Siri solve the mystery for him.
  5. Protagonist’s catch phrase is, “Don’t that put a bunch in your panties?”
  6. Detailed explanations of Spider Solitaire games provide all the action.
  7. Protagonist is tragically addicted to red licorice.
  8. Villain keeps saying, “Do you want some lemonade before I kill you?”
  9. Plot involves big government conspiracy to keep “Wheel of Fortune” on the air.
  10. Race against the clock is resolved when everyone realizes it’s Daylight Savings Time.

Published by mcbruce56

Writer living in the high desert of San Bernardino. Winner of the 2018 Black Orchid Novella Award. Creator of Minerva James and other strange characters.

2 thoughts on “Ten Mistakes You’re Making in Your Novel”

  1. Consider using this in your next mystery: Killer caught with the assistance of bug evidence provided by a forensic entomologist (but not “Body Farm” decomposition results). Entomologist examined insects trapped in a car radiator to prove that the auto had indeed been driven to California. See “Family Massacre: The Harper Family, Season 1, Episode 4, 12/31/21; also, Dateline: Mystery of the Lost Weekend, 7/24/09. Very clever!!

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  2. That’s kind of a prosecution kind of thing. But I will tell you the same thing I told my brother, who had all kinds of ideas for plots: You might want to try writing one yourself! It’s fun and harmless. Except to the poor radiator bugs.

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