Listen, we’ve all been there.
A day or two–or four–of heavy activity far from the comforts of home and our underwear stops being a protective shield for our private parts and starts melding into our, um, private parts.
But good lord, does the internet need to describe it to me?
It amazes me what qualifies as click bait. The above-caption was found on my nasty little Google feed.
Along with “Is Your Dog Psychic?” “The Ten Most Beautiful Women In History” and “Why Your Stomach Can’t Tolerate Late Night Beets.”
My stomach can’t tolerate beets at all.
Who comes up with this stuff? And when you click the bait, more often than not you are hoodwinked.
What happens when you don’t change your underwear? Slimy biological things no one wants to discuss. Except the poor slug that was assigned the story by her editor.
The Ten Most Beautiful Women In History? Um, how do they know? Was a recent glamor shot of Joan of Arc recently uncovered? Did Cleopatra leave selfies? And Helen of Troy–she just wants to be left alone.
As for my dog, I am sure he is psychic. He always seems to know when I open the dog food.
(Okay, I lie. I don’t have a dog. My ex wife does, and all that beast does, when they come to visit, is stare at me adoringly. Any creature who thinks I am worthy of adoration is clearly twitterpated.)
Mark Bruce, Writer 