Old Paint

In old western movies, a cowboy’s horse is his best friend. Confidant, partner, escape vehicle, love interest…

So when it happens that the horse gets too old to escape the bad guys or breaks his leg, the sad scene come when, to put the beast out of its misery, it has to be shot.

Of course, no one asks the horse if he has a better idea.

I’ve been thinking of this sad scenario lately because my beloved couch, nicknamed “Ol’ Paint,” has had it. My back has been aching for weeks now and I realize it’s because Ol’ Paint is worn and sagging. It gives me no support where I need it.

Time for a new couch.

When the time comes to replace a familiar old couch, one thinks of the good times. The hot-blooded blondes who warped the couch’s springs, the crazy redheads who pulled a knife in the middle of foreplay (and were foiled by the couch’s cushions), the healing brunettes who nursed a broken heart back to health so that it could go after the blonde again…

Of course, in the last ten years, my memories on this couch are more of Netflix, books read, and afternoons home from work sick trying to recover from some insidious virus.

And I’ll never forget the time I was sitting on Ol’ Paint and a nasty little sun spider wandered across the couch. If you’ve never seen one of these evil little creatures, you’ve been spared a horrifying experience. I’ve given you a link to assist your nightmares. The internet says they’re harmless. The internet has probably never been sitting on its couch at 10 p.m. reading a book when one of these beauties decides to wander across the cushions.

I’ve taken a lot of good naps on this couch–sun spiders notwithstanding. Indeed, sometimes I’ve found it hard to sleep in my bed and have gone out to snooze on the couch till dawn.

But there comes a time when even the most faithful, the most cherished of friends needs to go to that great used furniture store in the sky.

So it is with Ol’ Paint.

See you in my dreams, buddy.